Sunday, May 31, 2009

Bright Beauty

It Was His Religion

I didn't understand him. My father would go out to that river every Sunday and would fish. My mother didn't allow anyone else to go with him. We would all go to service. What gave him the right to skip out of it? He called it his religion. I only remember my mother mentioning church to him once and I'll never forget his reply.

"I learn more out there at the water than I ever will from that man's preaching."

I wondered what he meant by that. What could he possibly learn from the river water? All I learned from the river was how to get my shoes dirty and my mother mad. Or perhaps how to catch a frog without his expecting anything.

But still, my father went out every Sunday.

Finally one Sunday I didn't bother asking my mother again. I asked him instead.

"Dad, can I go with you today?"

He didn't look up from the fly he was tying. He didn't look up to see the disapproving look in my mother's eyes. All he did was nod once and say, "Yes, I guess it's about time you try my religion."

My mother didn't have anything to say to that. She just pursed her lips and went back to getting my little sister's ribbon tied in her hair. I knew she was upset, but I didn't care. I didn't want to go to church today. I didn't want to sit in the pew and hear the same man talk about the same things again. I wanted to understand my father.

I helped my dad carry his equipment to the truck. It made me feel important in a way. I also felt a little out of place. I was so used to wearing my uncomfortable Sunday best on this day of the week. It felt a bit odd to be dressed in my play clothes.

It wasn't long and we were standing at the river together. He hadn't said a word. Once in a while he would whistle through his teeth as he tied a fly to his line. I sat on a rock next to him as he waved the pole over his head and into the water.

It was so still. There was not even a breeze in the air. The water was crystal-like and showed the reflection of the trees like glass. The only motion was my father and his line, and the slight ripple it made in the water. It was quiet. It continued to be this way for some time. Once in a while there would be a slight jerk to his line and he'd reel in a fish just like that. It looked easy enough to me. I could have fallen asleep if the rock I sat upon was more comfortable.

Then after what felt like an hour or so, he turned to me. "Come over here and try this out."

I took a hold of the rod and he showed me how to work it. It seemed easy enough.

Then I felt a little tug and my father told me to start reeling. So I did.

All at once the tension was gone and the line came in quickly.

I'd broken the line.

He told me to be more gentle. He told me that the big fish that bite are going to put up a fight, that I have to be patient and they will get tired before me.

Then he took back the pole.

And I resumed by position on the rock.

What happened next I will never forget. I will forever remember the way it was. There was a tug on his line and away he went. He was in the water! He kept a hold of his pole and started splashing through the water. I didn't understand it. What was he doing? Doesn't that scare the fish away? But there was still tension on his line. He headed down the river and I followed along the bank watching until he came up with a fish the size of his whole arm.

I didn't understand it then, but I never forgot it. Now I understand what made it a religion.

We may fight with things to the point of breaking, but if we have the patience to hold on, if we are gentle and submissive, we will come off conquerer. He had waited for the fish to get tired. He had kept his line from breaking. And he had won.

I didn't go with my father on Sunday again after that. I went back to church as Mother said. But I never forgot the experience and I never will.

Saturday, May 30, 2009


O my angel from heaven
I'm taken by thee
My heart is forever thine
Thou art finer than everything fine

For wherever I go
I have thy comfort
Whatever I face
I find thee by my side

To have and to cherish
To enjoy and to savor
Thou art my life
Thou art my love

Forever thine
Scrumptious, melting
Soft, delectable


O, angel
Thou teasest me...

O my angel from heaven
Thy beauty and passion...
What sweetness thou bringest to me
What overwhelming satisfaction
Simply scrumptious...

I shall have another

Friday, May 29, 2009


Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Soaring Dreams

Between my fingers
I hold the stem
A cloud of white
Is made by them

The tiny souls
Cling gently here
Soon to ride
The breeze, no fear

I close my eyes
Await a start
I make a wish
Within my heart

The wind whispers
My minds' eye hears
I arise within
Beyond my years

I take a breath
Then gently out
The tiny souls
Release about

My wish is taken
Upon the wind
They dance around me
Then off they send

My wish will follow
Into the sky
My heart soars also
And away I fly

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Babbled Secrets

I sit upon a stone
In the shade of the trees
Quite always on my own
I rest arms curled about my knees

The brook slowly flows
Along down beside me
A gentle breeze blows
I close my eyes and see

Sunlight filters in
Through waving leaves above
It dances on my skin
Encircling me in love

The brook babbles about
In a language I concede
The secrets in its quiet shout
Wisdom given, I must heed

Its whispers pierce me to my heart
I must endure, I must impart

For life goes on in spite of pain
I stand and face the world again

My Toes


Hands clap together
So cold

The crunch of leaves
Beneath covered feet
Through the trees

Thick mist
Faded trees

The gray fades
to white or black
Around the cold branches
Trees in the mist

Crunching leaves
White cold hands
Clasping, wringing
Sniffing, sobbing


(an attempt to create a person symbolizing an emotion)

Monday, May 25, 2009

Memorial Day Flag


Time spent
Tears shed
Blood spilt
Faith led
Lives lost
Hope restored
Courage given
Nation reborn

Memorial Thanks

(pic linked to source)

Thank you for giving
So much for us, as many
Take it for granted

For sacrificing
All, so we have the freedom
To live all our dreams

I say thank you for
Everyone else you give to
That never see it

I say thank you from
Me, my family, and nation
Thank you! You earned it...

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Meeting in Traffic

He was so angry he had been cut off like that. The person in front of him hadn't even signaled and was now creeping in front of him at a snails pace. As if cutting in front of him made it so they could go anywhere anyway!

She was in such a hurry! Her daughter was singing as we speak and she knew her big brown eyes were going to be sparkling with tears when she would arrive too late. She had to make it on time! But this traffic was going so slow!

She had a wedding to get to. She was the maid of honor. She was one of the most important to be there and she didn't want to let down her best friend.

He was a father of two children riding in his back seat. He didn't have a wife anymore. She had left him long ago. His children echoed each other back and forth, "Are we there yet?", "Are we there yet?", "Are we there yet?" He sighed and looked in his review mirror.

He saw her face, just looking back to the road in front of her and putting away some kind of make-up. Lipstick maybe? She looked tense but beautiful. Dressed up in some kind of formal wear. Perhaps she was late for a special occasion... How lovely she was. He wished he could meet her perchance.

Suddenly the car ahead of him took off and smashed into the SUV in front of it. What was going on? He looked through his review mirror again at the woman and she had a shocked look on her face. Was she getting out? Yes, she was getting out! "I'll get out too." He thought.

"You kids stay in the car." He told his children as he opened his door.

The man driving the vehicle in front of him was out of his car already and he was rushing forward to the SUV in front of him, shouting about being insulted by the person driving the SUV. The woman got out of her SUV now. She had tears streaking down her cheeks. They shouted at each other. Something about a daughter's school program and it went on as if nothing else in the world mattered but this instant.

The father looked back at the Maid of Honor and winked. She had stopped in her tracks, staring at the spectacle in front of them.

"I have a wedding to get to, you know." She said. Her voice was soft even in her frustration.

"Well, I'd imagine it will be a while before you get there." The father spoke back.

All cars around were still, stopped in their tracks. Their cars were too close together. There was no moving and the man and woman were now on their cell phones. The moment seemed to be a long one.

But when he looked back at the maid, she smiled. How unexpected.

"I guess we should just make the best of it..." She said, reaching into her car's open window. Out came a bottle of champagne. "I don't think these are going to make it to the wedding."

The father looked through the window at his children. They were throwing popcorn at each other.

"You have people in your car?" She asked, stepping forward to observe. "Ah. Well, champagne isn't something to have on the road anyway." She hurried back to her car, set down the bottle and withdrew a box of crackers with some fancy cheese spread.

The father smiled. The shouting behind him had risen again, but it seemed like background music in her presence. "I'm John."


(Photo by br3w0k)

Monday, May 18, 2009

A Quiet Escape

A lazy evening of screaming children
I must get out and away
My husband sits in front of the television
I guess this is his time of the day

I exit the back door quietly
I creep away barefoot and free
He probably won't even notice I'm gone
Until the kids whine and "where's me?"

I carefully place my feet before me
In the grass, through the field and glen
The quiet around me breath into my lungs
And I feel like a child back then

My thoughts are alighted, I grow close to the water,
The reflection is dark in the dusk
I want to sit longer, but know I must not linger,
My baby is hungry I trust

But I sit awhile on the bank of the river,
Seeping in the light through my skin
I wish I could lay here for hours on hours,
But I must care for my kin

So up I go and backtrack again
Carefully placing my feet
But one day I'll return here, my soul to replenish
The sounds of the forests' heartbeat

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Finding Purpose

There once was a little flower. Budding anew in the green. She looked at the ground and wondered what world she had been set into. She saw the green around her and wondered at her purpose. She contemplated as she grew. She hesitated at her own worth.

One day she lifted her head a little. She saw the other flowers. She saw they were beautiful and wondered how she fit in. She couldn't believe she herself could be quite that lovely. She couldn't comprehend she herself could bring such happiness as they.

She lifted her head higher one day to look at the big blue sky. She felt the warmth of the light above touch her face and she felt happy in her place. She wondered at the world she was set into. Then she caught sight of a lovely thing above her. Soaring so high and swirling in the sky. She felt her little heart inside her would burst as she watched it. The beautiful thing gracefully gliding in the wind that touched her slightly. Oh, how she wished she could join with this thing. How she wished she could soar up so high in the wind. Sighing, she settled herself in the earth. Feeling as if she didn't know her own worth.

The bird soared so high in the sky up above. She felt the wind blowing her feathers and sighed. She looked down to the earth below and wondered at the sight she saw. The loveliness below her sent her heart soaring higher than before. For below her she saw flowers of all kinds and colors. But one among the others drew her eye. It's head faced toward her with such magical glory. It's color was bright and contrasted with those around it. Oh how she wished she could be much like it.

Inspired by a friend's post here.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Washing Away the Tears

It had been years since Lily had been to this place. The years had worn away on her memory. Much of the wear and tear she welcomed. She had blocked out all the memories she had of this place. But being here made her feel like she had never left. It seemed like yesterday that she was a little girl again, smiling into his face. They were only children. Yet their world seemed perfect together.

She walked through the sand, feeling it seep between her toes, and remembered how he had told her they would get married someday. It made her smile to remember his child-like face, his little sweaty hand in hers, his big dark eyes and how they sparkled.

Then she saw it. It was barely visible, worn and smoothed out by the years of wind and water. But it was still there. She couldn't believe it was still there.

She ran her fingers over the sand stone and remembered him carving it out. The imperfect heart shape and their initials inside. G + L

Now her heart began to hurt. The reminder was plain before her. The deep wound to the right side of the heart was from a rock she had thrown at it after the accident.

She remembered feeling her body convulse in sobs, but not being able to hear them through the storm. She remembered the feel of her long wet hair sticking to her face, and the salty water sticking to her legs and clothing.

She remembered seeing George's cold, still body laying in the sand.

Lily blinked the memory away.

Suddenly this place didn't seem as warm. She looked up to the sky to see the sun had hidden behind a cloud. The sand beneath her feet was suddenly cooler than before. She stood and looked back down at the worn heart on the sand stone.

The tears rolled down her cheeks again, but this time she welcomed them. She needed this. Somehow letting the tears flow made the pain in her chest ease a little.

Softly she whispered into the silence, "I'm sorry, George." As she turned to slowly walk back across the sand the wind blew back her hair and she felt lighter somehow. Her lungs drew in a long, full breath and she felt like she hadn't felt so good in a long time. Somehow she felt she could hear him whispering back.

The glow in her chest came back. She looked up to the sky and the sun had come out again. She wiped away the tears on her cheeks, closed her eyes, and smiled into the sky. She couldn't help it. She was happy and it felt so good to be this happy again after so long.
"I love you, too."

Friday, May 15, 2009

The Power of Words

I felt like my heart was broken. I felt like I had perhaps made the wrong decision. I sat on our dirty couch, looking at my husband of three months and sighing. He seemed so unhappy. What had I done? All he would do was watch football and sleep. Had I done the right thing? I knew marriage was hard, but I thought there was supposed to be a honeymoon stage when everything was rose-colored and happy. This was not the picture I had painted in my head throughout our engagement. What happened? I didn't know who to turn to. I didn't want anyone outside of my marriage to think it was going to end. Because I didn't believe in divorce. I didn't want it to end. There had to be another way.

I grabbed my purse and keys. He didn't seem to care I was leaving. I felt like I couldn't breath. I needed air. I whispered to him that I would be back and he barely nodded his head without looking up.

The drive was short, but my thoughts were spinning. What was I going to do? What would the future with him be? I let the questions form tears as I sobbed and cried out to the only one I felt I could.

Then I saw it. The white walls called to me. The steeple beckoned to me. The sight of it reminded me of the day I took my vows. The day I bound myself to him. The man I loved, who I knew loved me. The man that was having difficulty adjusting...and I remembered how I had felt. I had knelt at the alter and looked into his face. I had known it was right. The glow in my chest was unmistakable.

I stopped my car and got out. I stood looking across the field at the church and knew I had to kneel. So that's what I did. I poured everything out. I was overcome until my tears ceased. The choking pain in my lungs weakened and lifted from me. I knew I was where He wanted me. If it was to be hard for a while, it would be hard. But I was in this marriage for a purpose and I loved my husband.

I drove home slowly. Wondering what I should do when I come back through the door. Nothing came to mind. I didn't know what I would do.

The time came sooner than I thought. Suddenly, I was walking to the door and I had no plan in mind. Opening the door, I could still hear the television. He hadn't moved.

I walked in, brushed my hand on his cheek, rested it on his shoulder, and bent to put my lips to his ear. "I love you." I whispered. Then the tears came again.

This time they were shared. They wouldn't be the only tears we shed together, but this moment was one we both would remember forever.

Thursday, May 14, 2009


Heaven on Earth

Budding Anew

Maturing Love

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

My Ideal Relaxing Afternoon

The house, once chaos, now quiet
The sink, once filled, now empty
The floors, once covered, now tidy
The hair, once snarled, now combed
The little eyes, once curious, now closed.
The little fingers, once prying, now relaxed.
The little feet, once running, now still.
Nap time.
My ideal relaxing afternoon.

Almost End

The sky grows dark
The air is cold
The clouds are crowded
Sinking into me
Despair approaches

My heart is sinking
I feel overcome
But as I fall
The tempest parts
A light appears

Piercing through the darkness
Shining down
A ray of hope
A new day will come

Picture by pixel-def
His site is here

Monday, May 11, 2009

Interrupted Celebration

I bit into the caramel apple and felt it stick to my teeth. I rubbed it with my tongue to help it dissolve. All around me was the sound of laughter and joy. The festivities were so exciting! I was filled with bliss as the bright colors around me seemed to be brighter today in the sunshine. Today was a day of celebration! I waved my miniature flag in patriotic loyalty and looked around to find my dad.

Suddenly all the colors around me blurred together. All the sounds became dull and muted. Before me I could see the tip of a gun extended from within a man's coat. It seemed everything else around me was out of focus and I could see nothing but it.

They are here.

But as the explosive sounds began, my breath was gone. I felt so faint. The colors whirling around me suddenly went dark as my body hit the pavement and my caramel apple rolled from my fingertips and away.

Saturday, May 9, 2009

He Brings Me Joy

His smile is bright and he shows it to everyone. His eyes twinkle with excitement whenever he tells a joke. His hands are big and warm when he holds yours. His scent is crisp and happy. He is my dad.

Sunrise on the Nile

Waters standing still
the sun's fiery glow paints
a brand new day bright

Thursday, May 7, 2009


I was waiting at the bus stop and the phone in the phone booth started to ring. My friend and I were the only ones around for miles. Why would this phone be ringing? So my friend thought she should answer it.


What? Who is this?




...Oh crap..."

I watched as her face was confused, then shocked, then afraid...and I wished she hadn't answered the phone call.

"The voice told me not to get on the bus. To walk down the street to the east and not to look back when I hear the bus. He threatened if I did I would be killed! Oh, Candy, what do we do?! This threat could be for both of us! Come with me!"

I was frozen in place. What had we gotten ourselves into? Nevertheless I wasn't about to get on the bus with that kind of threat.

So together, we walked the road. In the middle of the wilderness. No life in front or behind. And waited.

We didn't say anything to each other. Both our minds were working too fast for conversation. A few minutes later we heard the bus behind us. I saw Shirley's eyes dart to the side for an instant and almost grabbed her arm.

"Don't look back."


I woke up on the ground with Shirley beside me. We were covered in black dust and laying on the side of the road. It was dark. I looked up to see a car idling on the road. A note taped to the door read in bold letters. "GET IN AND DRIVE" I shook Shirley's shoulder to wake her up. She mumbled something incoherent and rolled to her side.

I got up and ripped the letter from the door, reading the small print.

"This car is for your convenience. Take it where you need to go and abandon it on the side of the road. Thank you for your cooperation."

We did just that.

The next morning, Shirley and I awoke in our hotel room remembering what had happened and wondering if it had been real. I would have thought it was a dream except that she had been there with me.

Shirley flipped the TV on while I was in the bathroom doing my make-up.


I came out and stared. There on the news was a story about an explosion on the bus in North Dakota that had killed a Senator on his way home from a camping trip with his family. There was no evidence of who had planted the bomb. There was one survivor who had left the bus moments before the explosion. He believes it came from two women he saw walking away from the scene. Police are investigating.

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Her Green Eyes

Her eyes are green
Luscious and sweet
I visit her often
At any time we can meet

I can sit with her peacefully
Just enjoying the silence
Or sometimes I'll whisper
My secrets warm to her sense

She loves me forever
I know this, I must
Because I love her too
Since she I can trust

For throughout all my longing
And lifetime of me
This green-eyed friend, immortal
She helps me feel free

Photo by Ricardo Silva

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Long Shadows

The sun is bright
Through the trees
All is still, quiet
There is no breeze

The sun is fading
To the soft ground
The trees whisper softly
Making no sound

Their shadow stretching
Farther and farther
Softly reaching
Holding together

The tip almost touches
The last stepping stone
But then it is hidden
No longer on it's own

The sun is fading
Behind the earth
The long shadows are sleeping
Until tomorrows rebirth

Photo by LKBphoto

Monday, May 4, 2009

My Shadow

Shadows are dark against the light
They throw contrast to what we see
Many say the light is goodness
And shadows signify the bleak

But my shadow is happy
Happy because it sees the light on the other side
Happy because without it, we couldn't see the light
Happy because without it, there could be no light

My shadow in the grass smiles up at me
Darker then the rest
Bringing me more knowledge than the best

Shadows are dark against the light
They throw contrast to what we see
Many say the light is goodness
My shadow makes that so

Photo by OnurY


Laughter shines in their faces
Happiness echoes in the wind
Cheer radiates from their sways
They smile up at the sky

Their heads raised in comfort
Touching the soul
Making it lighter
A small gift given to us

The yellow flower

Photo by Caveageman

Abandoned Rose

It was the most romantic night of my life. I couldn't remember being any higher than I was tonight. The moon was out, the stars were bright, and I saw his eyes twinkle as we strolled near the pond, hand in hand. I held his rose in one hand, drinking in its scent now and then as we chatted of life, love, and anything else that we wanted to share. I was closer to him than I've been to anyone. We slowed and embraced. Our faces touched and his lips caressed my cheek.

Then she appeared.

She was crying, holding her face in her hands, and watching us with so much pain in her eyes.

I broke away from him as she approached, mascara streaking down her cheeks. Her eyes were focused only on him. It was as if I was invisible. My happiness was shattered as she grew inches from his frowning, concerned face. She whispered the words "How could you?", and placed something small into his hand now parted from mine. Before she turned, her sad eyes flickered to me and caught my eye. They focused on me for a moment, a glint of anger and hatred appeared, and then something else...admiration? No...a longing envy. She then turned and sprinted away, letting a gut-wrenching sob escape from her lips.

My heart broke for her.

Then it broke for me as he turned away from me, hiding the sparkling object she had given him.

I knew what it was. The rose slipped from my fingers. I wanted to punch him. I wanted to scream at him for her. But instead I walked away. I abandoned him just like I had abandoned the rose that now floated near the rocks at the edge of the pond.

No one touched it.


Blog Widget by LinkWithin